I came to a conclusion today - one I think I've come to before. I'm marrying a Brit. Yes, its final. I'll do whatever it takes to make sure I marry a Brit. That may even involve returning to London for a bit!
I just had an email sent to me by a Britsih guy and it said "I've got a horrible London accent... you may like it??? I can do a dodgy NY/NJ accent :D"
DODGY!!!!!! Man, I miss those crazy Brits.
Shout out to Queen's Arms!
Monday, March 23, 2009
Saturday, March 21, 2009
Fiesta Dinner
Dinner was a success tonight or at least I thought so. There was A LOT of food. Way too much food. But it was fun nevertheless. Favorite recipe of the night? Pineapple Jalapeno sorbet (maybe its because Jalapeno reminds me of Jalpa - we're a good match for each other).
In other news - I'm starting to dislike the fact that my 2 best friends (yes, my cousins) are married. I mean, I love their wives, but I miss my brothers. Oh well, life goes on. Guess I'll just have to find my beau soon.
GMAT prep? eh, its stalling. Spent all day cooking today. Had a lazy Thursday and Friday prior to that. Hopefully tomorrow proves to be a more efficient study day.
Ah and speaking of studying - the CFA awaits. I was sharing my books with my guests today and realized I have a crapload to read. Anyone interested in reading it for me?
Well its time for bed - the cooking (and mainly eating) got to me.
Food will always be there, even though no one else may be.
In other news - I'm starting to dislike the fact that my 2 best friends (yes, my cousins) are married. I mean, I love their wives, but I miss my brothers. Oh well, life goes on. Guess I'll just have to find my beau soon.
GMAT prep? eh, its stalling. Spent all day cooking today. Had a lazy Thursday and Friday prior to that. Hopefully tomorrow proves to be a more efficient study day.
Ah and speaking of studying - the CFA awaits. I was sharing my books with my guests today and realized I have a crapload to read. Anyone interested in reading it for me?
Well its time for bed - the cooking (and mainly eating) got to me.
Food will always be there, even though no one else may be.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Saturday, March 14, 2009
An Existential Crisis
While browsing the internet - mainly news sources, Facebook, and Twitter - I noticed that Facebook has changed the question it asks us all on its homepage. The question now reads "What's on your mind". The old homepage, as many of you may or may not recall, read "What are you doing". The latter was definitely a lot easier to answer than the former.
I can only be doing a few things - talking to a friend, reading a book, skiing - but there's a whole slew of topics on my mind. For example, last night I was given approval to move back to my apartment in Chicago - do I want to move back? will I move back? will I find a job there? Another example - I sat through a 5 hour prep course this morning that is supposed to help me attain an international financial designation - will this change my career prospects? will I make more money?
There's a lot on my mind. Most of it would rank "junior subordinated" on the CAST page at work, but still, its important to me.
Slumdog Millionaire lovers, whats your view on the new Pussycat doll video? The movie didn't change my life like it did for many - yes it was an upbeat movie in a down economy. However, I think the reason many enjoyed it was the fact that the director was British and the movie was based on a country they all had heard about.
Anyways, thats enough babble for tonight. Still trying to get my thoughts in order. This might not be the most elegant blog, but I'm still trying to articulate my thoughts properly.
So much of what I'm doing now is out of sight, but that doesn't make it any less important - J
I can only be doing a few things - talking to a friend, reading a book, skiing - but there's a whole slew of topics on my mind. For example, last night I was given approval to move back to my apartment in Chicago - do I want to move back? will I move back? will I find a job there? Another example - I sat through a 5 hour prep course this morning that is supposed to help me attain an international financial designation - will this change my career prospects? will I make more money?
There's a lot on my mind. Most of it would rank "junior subordinated" on the CAST page at work, but still, its important to me.
Slumdog Millionaire lovers, whats your view on the new Pussycat doll video? The movie didn't change my life like it did for many - yes it was an upbeat movie in a down economy. However, I think the reason many enjoyed it was the fact that the director was British and the movie was based on a country they all had heard about.
Anyways, thats enough babble for tonight. Still trying to get my thoughts in order. This might not be the most elegant blog, but I'm still trying to articulate my thoughts properly.
So much of what I'm doing now is out of sight, but that doesn't make it any less important - J
Friday, March 13, 2009
Never Settle For Anything Less Than Perfection
I made a decision today. A decision I have thought about many times over the years. It's something I was convinced I never did. But after carefully thinking about my past - mainly this past year - I realized I always made this mistake. A mistake no one should make, a mistake that we should all learn from, a mistake that I vow to never make again. I always settled.
Whether it was a grade in my freshman year biology class or a progression of my life, I always settled. I would, not necessarily happily, accept a grade on a test. I would let myself believe that I have worked the hardest I could and that this is the best I can do. Bullshit. I can do better than this. And if anyone can do it, I can.
I had a conversation with my mom earlier today and she said that I'm way to stressed, that I'm way to angry, and that I need to stop worrying about everything and relax. How can I relax? I have so much to do, so much to learn, so much to give back (probably shouldn't have spent the last few hours on facebook and youtube).
I set high goals for myself and those around me. I think that is what pisses people off the most. I expect too much - not from them, but from myself. I don't want to be average - I've been average all of my life. I wasn't Valedictorian of my high school class and I didn't graduate college with honors. I wasn't hired at an investment bank nor do I drive a Mercedes SLK320.
I'm tired of being average. And so today, I decided, I will not be average and will not accept anything less than sheer perfection. How's this for a start?
There is a pot of gold and its full of sheer perfection - J
Whether it was a grade in my freshman year biology class or a progression of my life, I always settled. I would, not necessarily happily, accept a grade on a test. I would let myself believe that I have worked the hardest I could and that this is the best I can do. Bullshit. I can do better than this. And if anyone can do it, I can.
I had a conversation with my mom earlier today and she said that I'm way to stressed, that I'm way to angry, and that I need to stop worrying about everything and relax. How can I relax? I have so much to do, so much to learn, so much to give back (probably shouldn't have spent the last few hours on facebook and youtube).
I set high goals for myself and those around me. I think that is what pisses people off the most. I expect too much - not from them, but from myself. I don't want to be average - I've been average all of my life. I wasn't Valedictorian of my high school class and I didn't graduate college with honors. I wasn't hired at an investment bank nor do I drive a Mercedes SLK320.
I'm tired of being average. And so today, I decided, I will not be average and will not accept anything less than sheer perfection. How's this for a start?
There is a pot of gold and its full of sheer perfection - J
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Turnin' Back the Hands of Time -- Or At Least Pretending I Can
Apologies in advance for a long first post, but its been all building up for 21 years now...Enjoy!
I think all of us at some point have look back at our lives and said "I should've done this...I would've done this...I could've done this". That's the point I'm at right now -- yes, right at this very moment, while I sit at work staring at a 10K and try to figure out where this term loan came from. How did this shoulda-woulda-coulda phase (lets hope its just a phase) start? Well, I just graduated college a few months ago, my parents are still paying of thousands of dollars in loans, and I'm working a temporary job in the middle of nowhere. Its literally in the middle of nowhere - they have to provide us with food here because there isn't a restaurant for miles.
So if you're reading this (I like to pretend someone cares about my life), you'd probably like to reach through your computer screen, shake me, and tell me "HEY! AT LEAST YOU HAVE A JOB!!". -- You're right and I completely agree with you, I have a job. Thats the problem - its a job, not a career, not a lifelong goal or passion, but merely a job. That's where this whole shoulda-woulda-coulda sprung up from.
The Shoulda
The shoulda has nothing to do with career, jobs, or the economy that has failed us all. It has to do with a failed relationship - a relationship that has been over for 2 years now. It's probably one I wouldn't get back into if I was asked to, but it's one I still think about and would like to share with you. This relationship is one of those "high school sweetheart" types - I met my ex at a summer program back in 2004. We both went to different high schools and with my super conservative parents, it was hard for us to have a "normal" relationship, but somehow we managed. I think all the credit goes to him ( a him that will remain unnamed ) actually - he just dealt with my overprotective family life, my jealousy towards all his female friends, and my competitive attidue when we sat through the same college courses. I guess all good things must come to an end at some point and 2.5 years later this one did.
I shoulda been a better girlfriend.
The Woulda
How does an Indian girl who announced at her dance graduation to 1000 people that she was going to be a radiologist end up working as a Fixed Income Consultant? I applied to colleges 3.5 years ago and declared my major as Biology/Pre-med my first year at school in Boston. I took all those first year science courses, attended all my labs, and studied for my exams. Despite the desire to one day become an ER doctor (not because of the show, but because of actual experience working in the ER), I quickly let my dream die. I went from being a nerdy, science geek to someoen who wanted to make millions working for an investment bank - I become an Economics major. My economic classes were great, the professors were outstanding, and my diploma hangs proudly with my mom's expensive china. Do I regret switching majors - no, of course not *Never regret anything because at one point it was exactly what you wanted*. Did I give up on a dream without a fight? Yes I did. Do I regret that? Most definitely.
I woulda been in med school by now.
The Coulda
Where was I 1 year ago? Boston. Where was I 2 months ago? London. Where was I 6 weeks ago? Chicago. Where am I now? New Jersey.
I dont move around as often as it looks. I was in Boston for my undergrad education and in London for a study abroad program, but Chicago and New Jersey is where lies the problem. My move to Chicago was decided on a whim. I knew if I worked in NYC, I would be living at home. San Francisco was too far away from my family on the east coast. The south? -- I get more of laid back feel from the south. So, I looked at a map of the United States of America and chose...the windy city of Chicago. Had I been there before? No. Did I know anyone there? No. Did I have a job there? No. So, I applied to a few positions, interviewed for a small percentage of those, and got hired for one. Super excited about a life on my own, I leased an apartment in a high rise downtown. I even got accepted to a great program at a top 5 school! Everything seems picture perfect right? Well, idiot me moves out to Chicago and gets scared! Scared of being in the real world, scared of being on my own, scared of having to pay bills. I call up mommy and daddy and beg them to take me back - and like good parents, they do. So, now I'm in NJ, living at home once again. Kind of ironic isn't it? I decided on Chicago so I wouldn't have to live at home, but that's where I live now. Lesson learned, I guess. Now it's the battle of getting them to let me move back. Pray for me, I need all the help I can get.
I coulda been a Bears fan. (ummm, ok, that would never happen - Giants all the way!)
In conclusion, I shoulda-woulda-coulda had the perfect life.
I shall, I can, and therefore, I will - J
I think all of us at some point have look back at our lives and said "I should've done this...I would've done this...I could've done this". That's the point I'm at right now -- yes, right at this very moment, while I sit at work staring at a 10K and try to figure out where this term loan came from. How did this shoulda-woulda-coulda phase (lets hope its just a phase) start? Well, I just graduated college a few months ago, my parents are still paying of thousands of dollars in loans, and I'm working a temporary job in the middle of nowhere. Its literally in the middle of nowhere - they have to provide us with food here because there isn't a restaurant for miles.
So if you're reading this (I like to pretend someone cares about my life), you'd probably like to reach through your computer screen, shake me, and tell me "HEY! AT LEAST YOU HAVE A JOB!!". -- You're right and I completely agree with you, I have a job. Thats the problem - its a job, not a career, not a lifelong goal or passion, but merely a job. That's where this whole shoulda-woulda-coulda sprung up from.
The Shoulda
The shoulda has nothing to do with career, jobs, or the economy that has failed us all. It has to do with a failed relationship - a relationship that has been over for 2 years now. It's probably one I wouldn't get back into if I was asked to, but it's one I still think about and would like to share with you. This relationship is one of those "high school sweetheart" types - I met my ex at a summer program back in 2004. We both went to different high schools and with my super conservative parents, it was hard for us to have a "normal" relationship, but somehow we managed. I think all the credit goes to him ( a him that will remain unnamed ) actually - he just dealt with my overprotective family life, my jealousy towards all his female friends, and my competitive attidue when we sat through the same college courses. I guess all good things must come to an end at some point and 2.5 years later this one did.
I shoulda been a better girlfriend.
The Woulda
How does an Indian girl who announced at her dance graduation to 1000 people that she was going to be a radiologist end up working as a Fixed Income Consultant? I applied to colleges 3.5 years ago and declared my major as Biology/Pre-med my first year at school in Boston. I took all those first year science courses, attended all my labs, and studied for my exams. Despite the desire to one day become an ER doctor (not because of the show, but because of actual experience working in the ER), I quickly let my dream die. I went from being a nerdy, science geek to someoen who wanted to make millions working for an investment bank - I become an Economics major. My economic classes were great, the professors were outstanding, and my diploma hangs proudly with my mom's expensive china. Do I regret switching majors - no, of course not *Never regret anything because at one point it was exactly what you wanted*. Did I give up on a dream without a fight? Yes I did. Do I regret that? Most definitely.
I woulda been in med school by now.
The Coulda
Where was I 1 year ago? Boston. Where was I 2 months ago? London. Where was I 6 weeks ago? Chicago. Where am I now? New Jersey.
I dont move around as often as it looks. I was in Boston for my undergrad education and in London for a study abroad program, but Chicago and New Jersey is where lies the problem. My move to Chicago was decided on a whim. I knew if I worked in NYC, I would be living at home. San Francisco was too far away from my family on the east coast. The south? -- I get more of laid back feel from the south. So, I looked at a map of the United States of America and chose...the windy city of Chicago. Had I been there before? No. Did I know anyone there? No. Did I have a job there? No. So, I applied to a few positions, interviewed for a small percentage of those, and got hired for one. Super excited about a life on my own, I leased an apartment in a high rise downtown. I even got accepted to a great program at a top 5 school! Everything seems picture perfect right? Well, idiot me moves out to Chicago and gets scared! Scared of being in the real world, scared of being on my own, scared of having to pay bills. I call up mommy and daddy and beg them to take me back - and like good parents, they do. So, now I'm in NJ, living at home once again. Kind of ironic isn't it? I decided on Chicago so I wouldn't have to live at home, but that's where I live now. Lesson learned, I guess. Now it's the battle of getting them to let me move back. Pray for me, I need all the help I can get.
I coulda been a Bears fan. (ummm, ok, that would never happen - Giants all the way!)
In conclusion, I shoulda-woulda-coulda had the perfect life.
I shall, I can, and therefore, I will - J
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